The last time my husband and I saw George Carlin perform—it was during his last HBO special, It’s Bad for Ya—he looked pretty ill. He was as pithy and wonderful as ever, if not even darker than usual, but his eyes were sunken in and his face just seemed so… old. Well, he was 71, after all, so I don’t know why we were surprised; after enjoying his comedy for a decade of our lives, I guess we just expected him to live forever. And though it sounds cliché, he definitely will through his amazing comedy and social commentary, books and DVD specials, and unforgettable Supreme Court case—which he seemed to be very proud of.

It even seemed like George knew he was getting close to the end, at least to us. His topics centered around death even more so than usual. His stance, his demeanor, just seemed to speak of doom. When he passed away in 2008—it doesn’t even seem like it should be that long ago!—we both experienced profound sadness. It felt as if a good friend had died.

Carlin’s “semi-autobiography,” Last Words, is now available for reading. A series of dialogues recorded over many years by his friend Tony Hendra, it covers George’s memoirs from boyhood to adulthood, past the death of his beloved wife Brenda and even into the new love of his life, Sally Wade, with whom he was married for a decade before his death.

The book is classic Carlin in many ways, but don’t go expecting Brain Droppings or When Will Jesus Bring the Pork Chops? when you begin to read it. Much of it is very dramatic and sobering, particularly George’s mean father and drug use. When we think of George’s drug use, especially with his comedy, we usually imagine it to be very humorous—like the hippity-dippity weather man he created. We don’t imagine the drama, physical fights between himself and his wife, or the effects it had on their daughter, Kelly. The stories in the book show George as a human, something we who sort of idolize him never really thought about before.

George’s own disappointments with his works are also included, which were really surprising. As he gravitated away from sheer silliness into darker, more serious territory—like politics, abortion, the death penalty, religion, and other issues—he would waver back and forth, wanting to please his audience while remaining true to himself. His voice seemed to evolve on its own, becoming more polished and poignant as he aged. Seeing this side of George, his own insecurities despite his massive success, really adds a dimension to his character that makes him feel more like the guy next door even more than his own colloquial language. It was both humbling and interesting to learn more about one of our comedic heroes, and it was nice to revisit him and his life after missing him since his death.